Must Learn To Let it out in Silence

So no one ever was ever deafened by the screams created by words in a book, the internet, or a newspaper (remember those?). On the contrary, I am quite sure that some friendships of mine have been lost due to the near deafening screams, rants, and raves my frustrations can lead to.

I am determined to turn into a civilized human being and although I'm rounding the quarter of a century mark - I'm confident that I've got time to mold myself yet.

I have started this blog for 2 reasons. The first is obvious, based on what you've already read, I don't want to fight, kick and scream every time I feel like it and I happen to think the best way to get around the feelings of ruin and anger would be to simply write it all down and let any of you sickos who actually feel like taking the time to read this, read it!

The second reason for me starting my very own blog is somewhere deep down inside of me is some sort of talent. I'm honestly not sure what that talent is. I work hard to be an actress and live in the loud luscious world of Los Angeles, but that can only go so far with DREAMS...Eventually I've got to produce something.

That brings me to my next topic...I am one who strives to be an individual and yet I am surrounded by people who are EXACTLY like me - those who are loud but pretty...funny but straight faced, sincere and flaky, stylish and broke (whether we choose to use plastic or not - we're all broke - until we make it)................With all of the commonalities I share with every other being in LA, I am determined to stand out. I wish this were as easily done as said.

I am always brainstorming different things to do or say publish or capture and yet it never happens. Why? As soon as I start something my perfectionist brain rips it apart. I trash it and forget the thought ever entered my mind. In all honesty if a little man - similar to the Monopoly man on the box (same size as the one on the box) could just crawl into my brain and take a tape recorder and some photos I think I could go far....I'm rambling - I'm aware...you needn't comment me to let me know...

Right, second reason I'm writing this blog: to somewhere along the line write something of value that could make both you and I laugh....Or at the very least make you think...on second thought I can't ask for anything more than a reaction - that would probably be the best thing I can hope for. Now this whole reaction thing may take some time, so your patience is much appreciated.

Peace
~AA